Divorce is never easy, especially when children are involved. Statistics reveal that while 66 percent of all divorced couples in the U.S. are childless, the parents of 1.5 million children divorce each year.
A good divorce attorney can provide law help and legal advice to assist you throughout the process. You want to hire someone with experience to answer all of your legal questions so that you can focus on your own emotional well-being and support your children through what can be a confusing ordeal for a young person caught in the middle.
Tips to Help Your Child Deal With Your Divorce:
1. Make it clear that the divorce is not about them.
Divorce may be hard for some younger children to understand. They may see it as a form of punishment, as if they did something wrong to make a parent go away. To best support your children, make it very clear that they did nothing wrong. Tell them that nothing they did caused the split and that there was nothing they could have done to prevent it. Let them know that they are loved.
2. Do not badmouth your ex.
Turning your ex into the bad guy isn’t going to help the situation. The last thing your child needs is more tension and more negativity. You know how it goes: “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
3. Encourage open communication.
Let your child express his or her anger, sadness, frustration, etc. Talk things through and be honest without crossing any boundaries. Your child does not need to know every last detail of a nasty divorce, but you also should not sugarcoat the situation.
4. Take care of yourself.
The best way to take care of your kids is to take care of yourself. If you are in emotional distress, see a therapist, take up yoga, find a way to keep your own mind at peace. Children pick up on body language and emotional cues from their parents. If you are stressed, your child will likely become stressed as well.
Research shows that women file for the majority of divorces, but the process can have a profound emotional effect on men and children, as well. Again, one of the best things you can do is hire an experienced divorce lawyer to take some of the pressure off of your shoulders. To find qualified legal help, search online. In a recent poll, 44 percent responded that they are very to somewhat likely to check a lawyer’s website. Read reviews and ask friends and family for recommendations.
Once the legal nitty-gritty is out of the way, focus your energy on rebuilding a relationship with your children. It may not be easy, but they will need your support, and you may need theirs as well.